All We Need is Love - Merrill WI Meditation Teacher Speaks on Love

What is love? Love is not what we all grew up thinking it was.

For true love to work, we first have to build our foundation, which is self-love. Self love really starts when we can become whole in our own being. I like to say that we all have a side that we show the world, our good side. Then we all have that side that we keep hidden away, the side we don’t talk about or openly admit to anyone, even ourselves at times. We have to be able to acknowledge and accept that shadow side just as much as the good side. Then we can take the 2 halves and make a “whole”. The portal to every next version of ourselves is through the parts we avoid.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day distractions that many never really self-reflect on a level to fully understand or accept these not-so-pretty parts. Yet, it’s when we fully accept All that we are and become whole that we then truly can step into ourselves and embrace the beauty in our faults, our demons, as well as the shining, kind, warm-hearted beauties we all are. Side Note: When we own our shit, no one can hold it against us.

We’ve grown up in a society that, first, doesn’t teach us emotional intelligence, or how to even deal with emotions in a healthy way. Second, there’s a stigma around being vulnerable or having bad feelings. We’ve been conditioned to think this makes us weak - and that just isn’t the case. Emotions are just something we experience. They’re a universal language- something that connects us to one another. They help us navigate the world around us. What most of us don’t realize is how our emotions actually influence our behavior and how we react to the world around us.
Other things I think are very important when it comes to really experiencing true love - We need to let our guard down enough to allow ourselves to actually feel whatever it is we’re feeling without judgement. When emotions are too intense or overwhelming, or it’s an emotion we just don’t quite understand, we tend to push it aside and ignore. There is a downside to this that can have detrimental effects on the body. When we don’t allow our emotions to fully process they get stuck in the body and eventually lead to tension, discomfort, and even disease, as well as affecting how we respond to certain things in the future. This becomes our baggage.

We must also bring down our walls enough to open our perception to others to better understand them.
It’s also important to hold space for yourself and others. Holding space would be allowing someone or yourself to be whatever it is that they need to be in any given moment. Allowing a safe space without judgement, opinion, distraction, or reaction.

When it comes to experiencing true love on a real level, I believe there should also be a basic understanding that we ALL carry baggage, we’ve all been hurt in the past in some way or another. This is beneficial for being able to have compassion for you partner when they are overreacting or they get triggered by something.
Another understanding we should all have is the fact that men and women have very different needs physically, logically, and energetically. Men communicate through logic, while women communicate through emotion. Even the way we support each other is different.

For a woman to fully step into her divine feminine energy she needs to feel safe, and needs to feel safe expressing her emotion and feel heard and supported by her partner. A man needs to feel respected, trusted, and valued for what he provides. He can then step into his divine masculine energy.

When a woman can come home to that safe space and step out of her “pants” so-to-speak and just be a woman and her partner supports and understands and hears her, she naturally will want to provide the trust and respect for him to feel fully valued.
It is then that true love can be full of healing and growth, as well as a love that is nourishing for the soul.

It’s hard to tear down those walls though- it’s hard to figure out how to speak a language that is truthful, honest, loving and real. Because of past traumas and hurts most don’t have the skill set to truly and fully develop a deep intimate connection with someone- even in marriage. It’s hard to not worry about the ghosts of our past so we tend to let the voice inside our head drown out the voice inside our hearts. But when you find the person that makes you want to be so unapologetically yourself- scars and messy tears and all- then you’ve truly found your person.
When you truly love someone you see their hidden soul- You see the light they could shine on the world if they chose to.

It’s much harder to be with the real person meant for you than it is to be with someone not meant for you. True love will hold you accountable. They will mirror back all the things we couldn’t or can’t heal on our own. They’ll stir up all that deep dark shit and cause you to look at all the things you were afraid to look at. This requires a certain level of intimacy and vulnerability. Yet too often we get caught up in our insecurities and let fear dictate our thoughts.

Don’t you think it’s time to tear down some walls and heal. To deepen that intimate connection on a soul level. To heal on a soul level with the one person you would walk through hell and back with - well, that’s bliss. That’s when you realize that home isn’t a place, but a person.

We all deserve love. To give love and receive love. We all deserve a love that takes our breath away, a love that makes you want to be a better person. A love that has an understanding that you’re two separate souls, yet you fit together.
We all deserve a love that is not blind. True love makes us grow, and the more we grow, the further we can see.

And lastly- There is a letter that Albert Einstein wrote his daughter while on his death bed and told her to not share with anyone until the world was ready. It read:

There is an extremely powerful force that so far science has not found a formal explanation for. A force that governs all and is beyond any phenomenon operating in this universe. It has not yet been identified by us. It’s the universal force of Love.
Science looked for a unified theory of the universe but forgot the most powerful force. Love is light that enlightens those who give and receive it. Love is gravity because it makes some people feel attracted to others. If we want our species to survive, if we want to find meaning, if we want to save the world - Love is the one and only answer.